Wednesday, November 26, 2008

History of Eff: Poetry Edition.

I came across some poems and prose from long, long ago. Many of them are cryptic, arbitrary or completely inspired by literature. Others are personal memoirs. In any case, here is the first of a few that I hope you will enjoy..


[era uoy.]
per- a perf- mind [i'm] eager to understand perfe-, a perfec- passion that burns to touch. you are the knowledge i just might forget, only so that i'll remember again. you're a velveteen laugh and shiny eyes, lips that pout to let me know just how bad you want, and just how very much you need. you are a treasure waiting to be, i am the appraiser who sees through common novelty.

[lrig elttil ym.]

you are the breath on my neck, and i just may be the hand on your thigh, the fingers through your hair. the too short shorts you'll wear to bed when the heat's too much to bear. you're knee-high black cotton socks and mary janes, and i'm the raised eyebrows they induce. while your pleated skirt sways over viciously pale-smooth thighs, my collar-and-tie grin shines. a sense of touch unfurls in violent disbelief as long, skeletal pleasure-tools slide closer, closer to. fingernail tapdance along a silky plateau, a shiver to acknowledge a job now well in progress.

[hself gnuoy gnignis.]
a waltz on ivory adapted to what might be the soundtrack of you and i, and it's big beats and loud drums. it's trumpets and a triangle played all so heavenly. it's your screaming violin solos perfectly accenting my weeping cello sweeps, so in hands held between us, an amphitheater packed with eager ears. watching, listening for this music held so dear and yet we two are the only ones who hear, the symphony of sound, of godly melody and ups and downs and i, and i..

fresh blood on blinding white porcelain. sudden bursts of energy. sleepless nights and hunting knives. you and i.

Monday, November 24, 2008

In My Life (Beatles Cover)

This week on TheeCommune is Beatles Week! There have been tons of great videos and more to come. I think Ryan (EshninerForest) and I are going to collab on a track soon as well. Not to mention the tracks that ColorMeKristen and I already recorded, which can be seen/heard on my main channel.

If you want to keep updated on all TheeCommune happenings, you can do so by following here: TheeCommune on Twitter

Take care, Bloggy Bloggerton.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Q: What does he mean when he says..

"It's futile" ?

a) There is no future in this.
b) There's no point in denying that there is.
c) Magic happens whether or not you want it to.
d) Nothing, they're just words.
e) All or nothing... of the above.

Guess and win.

Friday, November 14, 2008

TheeCommune gathers and love unfolds.

I spent the last 8+ hours with ColorMeKristen and Heffasaurus (Kristen and Heather, respectively) We drank, we laughed, we cuddled. We personified the ideals we live by, and avoided the simplest consequences of disheartening circumstances. We ignored misfortunes and relished in each others' company. Theecommune would be proud.

There's a whole lot of footage from this night, and you can rest assured that a large portion of it will end up on my YT page for mass consumption. Much of it won't, inquire not. (Mysteriousssss)

I love life like a fat kid loves cake..

Tuesday, November 11, 2008


Part of me is tired of YouTube but mostly my channel. It feels like noone is watching anymore. I lose one or two subscribers a day regardless of what I put up. The sense of community has been losing steam, really. That's part of why I created the commune. But.. It's all making me feel very tired. And with over 200 subscriptions, there are only about five people whose videos I actually want to watch. The others I love just are not posting anymore.

Does this mean a hiatus is in order? I'm not sure..

Saturday, November 8, 2008

The Massacre at CQ. (Told and Transcribed)

There were once four young YouTubers that came across a hotel in Boston. and then one douchey man made them angry and revolt against the systems that had made them quiet little sheep. These YouTubers were not going to stand for it anymore!

---Based on a true story. Viewer discretion is advised.---

Cut to Heather standing in a hotel hallway.

[Douchey Man]
I'm trying to sleep in here.

[Billi, off camera]
I'm sorry.


[Chris Eff, incredulously]

[Kristalyn, perhaps?]
Let's gooooo..

We weren't even that loud!

[Chris Eff, through laughter]

---The Massacre at the CQ.---

The four begin walking down the hall. Chris Eff reaches over nonchalantly and rips a poster sized framed painting off the wall and drops it on the floor. His pace increases ever so slightly as the others, hands over mouths, fight back laughter.

Oh my.. oh my... oh my god!

Cut to Chris Eff standing in the elevator.

---The Rampage begins---

So open the door..

---The girls made us put two vacuum cleaners in front of the douchey man's door... it was their idea!---

Elevator door opens.. Chris Eff proceeds to drag a vacuum out of the elevator. It gets stuck in the crack leading into the hall. Everyone makes 'shhhh' sounds.

Lift the vacuum!

[Kristalyn, devilishly]
Lift it!

Nervous whispers are heard as the camera focuses in on the number plate of a door marked 1101.

[Chris Eff, to girls]
We're in this together.

Chris Eff proceeds to place both vacuums in front of the door. Suddenly a loud bang is heard and laughter erupts as the crew begins running down the hall away from room 1101. Suddenly, Billi realizes the girls entered the elevator and abandoned he and Chris during the plan that they themselves had hatched.

[Billi, out of love]
Fucking hoes! Fucking Bitches!

---So we were stuck on the eleventh floor---

Chris Eff is trying to open a door he hopes will lead to stairs.

[Billi, laughing]
Oh fuck, fuck! Fuckin.. shit's closed? It's locked?

Billi and Chris speed dash down the halls laughing, wind whipping past them as epicly as though they were breaking the sound barrier. Chris Eff reaches the end of the hall and tries another door. No luck.

That's a fucking room! That's a fucking room!

The two turn around, and dash in the opposite direction.

---This is us scrambling for a way down to the fifth floor.. our floor---

They find a door and go through it.

[Billi, screaming]

They climb some stairs and reach another door. Chris Eff wisely suggests they keep quiet before opening it. He reaches for the doorknob, but something isn't right.. Inexplicably they turn and run back the way they came, laughing and shouting 'oh fucks' at will. Billi reaches another door. Locked.

Oh fuck. We're trapped!

Camera pans over to Chris Eff who is waving Billi over.

What? What?

Billi walks through the door and without warning, he makes a sharp right turn into what appears to be a housekeeping closet and proceeds to pull out ironing boards that he finds there. This continues for some time. A whistle is heard from the hallway.

[Chris Eff]
Billi! Come on!

Is the elevator there? No it's not! You liar! I don't hear it!

Chris Eff disappears briefly, Billi continues pulling out ironing boards, and even sets one up outside the entrance of the room. Chris Eff appears around a corner to find Billi standing in the middle of the hallway laughing, dragging an ironing board. He breaks into uncontrollable laughter as well, and immediately grabs the board and drags it several feet down the hall, then abandons it to enter the broom closet.

Realizing these ironing boards are the funniest things there, he grabs another, opens it and proceeds to drag it to the elevator.

[Billi, laughing still]
Wait, wait!!

Billi throws two pillows on the floor in the hallway and places an iron gently on top of one of them. Another iron is seen on one of the two ironing boards opened and sitting dead center of the hotel hallway. Billi follows, hysterical, as Chris Eff drags the ironing board to the elevator. Two vacuums are seen in front of a hotel room door near the elevator, a telling sign that the two had in fact only returned to the site of their original outburst. They are completely unaware as they enter the elevator, ironing board in tow.

Fucking let go! Fucking let go!!

Both are in the elevator, finding it hard to breathe from laughing so hard.

No, Five! Five! Five! Five!

Both are pushing the button for the fifth floor to no avail, briefly forgetting the elevator is keycard activated.

Oh shit, you have to put your card in! Oh shit, oh shit, we're gonna go to the lobby!! We can't go to the lobby with this shit!!!

Chris Eff drops the key and half the contents of his wallet. Billi is freaking out!

Oh shit, motherfuckin! The fuckin key, the fuckin key! We're gonna go to the lobby!

Chris Eff slides the keycard into the slot several times, but the floor button doesn't seem to be responding.

Holy shit, we've been revoked! WE'VE BEEN REVOKED!

The button finally works,

Oh nice, okay.

[Chris Eff]

Both laugh uncontrollably. Camera pans to the ironing board laying against the wall of the elevator at a 45 degree angle. Billi's doing.

We should put it askew! We should put it askew like that!

Chris Eff responds with a drunken mumble of some kind that can't be heard through his hysterical laughter.

This, my friends, is bonding as it was meant to be.

---The End---

Friday, November 7, 2008

I love you, tomorrow.

Tomorrow is always a better day. Except when it's not.. but it always has the potential to be.

That's the beauty of it.